She

One of the fondest memory of my childhood is when all the cousins used to sit on the floor of our lawn semi circling her and she used to give each one of us a small vessel/glass of different size and shapes filled with green substance and we used to drink the Neem ka Kadha with one hand, as other was busy holding the breath; eyes closed. That was the bad part, the good part used to come after we finish the whole thing, the sugar cubes. We loved fighting for the bigger cubes. Seeing all of us around having fun used to make her day.

She was old traditional Rajasthani lady. She had no teeth as far as I can recollect but she used to tell me proudly that when I was young and toothless she used to chew the food and feed me, She lost all her teeth pretty early. She had more wrinkles than females of her age would have had. She was fair, thin and beautiful.

I lost my Grandma (Dadi, we used to call her Bai) around Ganesh Chaturthi in 2003. She was in bad shape in last months of her life. I think she lost the zeal to live when her partner for so many years left her, My grandpa (used to call him Ba) passed away few year back. My grandpa had memory problem in his last years and hence he used to argue a lot with my Dadi but they were inseparable. My dadi never stayed without him, wherever they stayed, her other son/daughters house or our place. They stayed together.

Bai was calm and happy person, She was a doting Grandma, She treated all her grand children with great affection. Contrary to my impression My mother tells me that my Grandma was bit harsh in her younger days and used to discriminate between her children, She was biased towards her sons. Its hard to believe, As I have seen a totally different side of her. In fact She loved my Sister more than any one of her grandchildren.

Sister and I got to stay with her more than anyone else. My sister is obedient and hard working, The amount of effort she had put in for Bai and Ba is incomparable and I respect her so much for that(Though I never told her so). I was the one who used to fool around and used to have mock fight with Bai, used to tickle her, pull her cheeks, disturb her during her puja. She never ever raised her voice on me, She loved me too much. I hate the fact that I shouted on many occassions out of frustration when she was ill, when I think about that I feel ashamed I could have been so much better. The regretted I would die with.

I think she is the only person in my life I miss the most. I can’t imagine the amount of happiness on her face if she had seen me getting married. The love she would have showered on my wife. I miss, The random hugs I could give to her, Tickling her if she didn’t laugh on my aloofness, making her dance with me.

I miss her.

10 thoughts on “She

  1. One of the rare personal and sentimental posts coming from your end…but it’s so heart touching and warm…you do have more feelings in you than you let show :)

    • I think the post didn’t express my feelings properly, One reason may be that I have limitation on my vocab/grammar or story telling skills. Also that instead of hitting the ‘Preview’ button I accidentally pressed ‘Publish’ ( not sure but It could have been better) and once it goes into Google reader there is no coming back.

      But if it still touched you, Thanks. :) She was a lovely lady.

  2. Loved the post ATC, as Pooja rightly said, very unlike your usual posts, I actually checked if I was on the right page :)
    I am sure she was a lovely lady, it’s very apparent from your love for her.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s